Lucky13 Charity Dildo Drive

Fans of Combat Zone Wrestling, I am writing this to implore you to assist me in making [high-flying wrestler/plucky coke-fiend] Lucky13's dreams come true...

Several weeks ago, he politely demanded that I provide him with a "dildo ladder" (you can view the conversation on his Twitter account, because for some reason he felt compelled to post it online)...having very few dildos laying around the house that I'm not not actively using, I have thus far been unable to make his dream a reality. Lucky is one of my very best friends, and I feel as if I should go out of my way to bring his vision to life, which is why I'm asking you--the CZW faithful--to bring as many dildos as you can to next weeks Tournament of Death bloodstravaganza in Townsend, DE, from which we can try to construct this "dildo ladder" he's so keen on...

It's sort of like the "Make-A-Wish Foundation," except that, instead of a sick kid getting to go to Disney, an adorable mick gets to throw a Japanese wrestler onto an A-frame ladder with a sex toy exoskeleton...

Let's make this happen, people.